Wow – I can hardly believe we are already more than halfway through the summer! I have enjoyed the more relaxed schedule of the summer – sleeping in, not having to take kids to and from school, not having sports or events scheduled every night of the week. We had a great time visiting with my brother, Derek, and his wife, Alyson and kids in early June. The kids all got along so well – we hope they can end up here in Utah within the next couple of years at least.
Since my last two pregnancies were so hard, when I found out I was pregnant, I dropped our tentative plans for a trip to Mt. Rushmore this summer (which would have required a lot of driving and walking around.) Fortunately, this pregnancy has not been as bad as the last two, though I still have times of nausea every day and I am starting to feel and move like an old woman! Lest the kids remember this as the summer we did nothing, I will name some of the things we have already done: Jumpin’ Jacks (a place with giant trampoline-type inflatables), Discovery Park (a big playground structure in Pleasant Grove), fishing with Uncle James (Kristen’s husband), swimming lessons, Veterans Pool, “camping” in the back yard, Lehi Pool, Freedom Festival Hot Air Balloons, 4th of July Fireworks, mini-golfing, BYU Planetarium, Walter Wickes’ “I Spy” Exhibit at the BYU Museum of Art, and visiting the huge Spanish Fork windmills. We also plan to go to Seven Peaks Waterpark, Clark Planetarium, a petting farm, and camping with the extended Wilkins Family before I go back to Michigan in August for a “Sisters’ Weekend”.
I have realized this week just how spoiled I have been this summer since Steven and Daniel are gone at Scout Camp. Up to this week, I have been able to leave at least some of the younger kids at home with Steven and Daniel in charge when I go run errands – it makes me appreciate them as well as how much harder things will be when school starts again, and then when the new baby comes! We had to promise bribes of dinner or breakfast at their choice of restaurants in order to talk Steven and Daniel into going to Scout Camp and actually earning the merit badges for which they signed up. Until very recently, I have struggled to understand why I should force our boys to participate in the Scouting Program other than that our Church endorses the program. I am just beginning to understand that the program was developed in order to help boys learn how to become men. They learn life skills and how to be responsible citizens, as well as having the opportunity to interact with lots of good male role models. Since I haven’t always had this attitude, the boys have been resistant to suddenly embrace all the added work and meetings involved. Hopefully they won’t resent me at the end of all this! Steven, Daniel, and Michael have spent a lot of time this summer doing extra chores and piano practice in order to earn extra electronics time. It has been really nice for me to have chores done that normally just nag at me because I don’t have the time to get to them! Steven attended his first Youth Conference (a several-day retreat for the 14-18 year-old church youth) and he enjoyed it. He has also spent a fair amount of time emailing/instant messaging a girl friend (notice that is two separate words!) from school. I’m pretty sure they are just friends (which is all they should be since they are both only fourteen years old) but this relationship has introduced us to new territory in the parenting department. Steven has been to Taieno’s house for a pool party, and we have had her here to hang out and play games with the family. She is one of eight children, she seems very nice and down-to-earth - she was even comfortable with the craziness and antics of our household and with talking to me. Steven will be starting 9th grade (high school!) next month and all this makes me feel very unprepared and like I must be getting old!
Daniel has enjoyed making a series of “Bumble Rumble” movies with Windows Movie Maker (which he has posted on YouTube, in case you are interested…) He has an interesting sense of humor, and I’m glad he has found a good way to keep busy and use his creative brain during the long days of summer. Daniel really has his heart set on getting a dog, and he has put a lot of time into researching breeds and was even going to take care of the Wrights dog for 10 days while they were on vacation. I nixed that after one trial night when she whined and kept me (and, I fear, the neighbors) awake nearly the entire night. The kids loved having her here, but it would definitely have been a lot of work to keep the younger kids inside the house (out of her territory and messes.) I feel bad for Daniel, but while we still have small children and until I know the not-so-fun aspects of having a pet would not become my responsibility, I am just not willing to take it on.
Julia is so excited to be celebrating her 11th birthday on July 16th. We won’t be having a friend birthday party (I decided a couple years ago we would do those only for even birthdays,) but hopefully we can do some other things to warrant her excitement and make her feel special. She is excited that she will legally be old enough to babysit younger children, as up to this point I have not left her alone in charge of younger kids. Sometimes she can be very responsible and motivated: she can bake just about anything without my help, she has changed Emily’s diaper on occasion, and she plays well with most younger children. But then other times she is very petty and easily bothered (especially by Matthew) and doesn’t handle it very maturely. She always finds things to do (lots of reading, this summer) and has enjoyed getting together with school friends more.
Michael has played lots of electronics this summer – it seems to be the only thing he wants to do! On the upside, that means he has also done lots of extra chores and practiced the piano a lot. I should also acknowledge that he is much more pleasant to be around and has made a lot of progress in controlling his temper.
Alyssa’s favorite activity this summer has been catching butterflies. She has a generous sprinkling of freckles and pink skin across her nose and cheeks due to her daily hunts. We bought a little butterfly house and have ordered butterfly larvae. She especially is excited for them to arrive in the mail so that we can watch them turn into butterflies. The headaches and stomachaches which plagued Alyssa so severely this spring seemed to subside for most of a month after school let out for the summer. She has started complaining again a couple times a week, but it usually seems to coincide with her desire to sleep in our bedroom or upstairs on the couch. I really need to be better about journaling her activities and diet and symptoms so that we’ll have some baseline for comparison if this gets worse when school starts.
Natalie is generally a cheerful, pleasant person to have around. She occasionally becomes pouty and walks around with a grumpy face to show me her displeasure, but it doesn’t usually last very long. She loves to play with her Julia and Alyssa, and on the rare occasion that they are both gone, she frets, “What will I do while they’re gone?!” She is reading simple chapter books, but doesn’t do it unless I make her (like during our mandatory reading time every day.) She is very sweet about thinking to thank me for things like dinner or taking her somewhere. She split her chin open after slipping off a stool while sitting at the counter and was a trooper about getting the five stitches to close it up again. Natalie will be starting kindergarten in just a little over a month.
Lucky for him, Matthew is a cute boy. He has such an expressive face and such energy…that’s the good side. The bad side is that he can be so impatient and demanding, and he angers quickly when he doesn’t get his way. He has further torn up the wall in the bathroom during his frequent incarcerations there. I’m trying to teach him how to appropriately interact with other people even when they do things he doesn’t like, and that his actions have consequences. We have made very little progress on the potty front, which distresses me as we have just over a month left before school starts. I’m not sure how to get him to want to do it, but I think I at least need to be more consistent in making him try several times a day, or I will be very sorry when this baby comes if I have three kids in diapers again. We had three baby birds which hatched in a nest in one of the trees in our yard. After having found two of the birds dead within a couple days, we were happy to find the third bird alive but weak on the grass beneath the tree. All that first day the kids were so attentive, feeding it moistened bread and giving it shade. They were careful not to touch it, but loved to go and watch it. Matthew asked, “Is that baby bird part of our family now?” We were all so sad the next morning to find it sprawled out on the grass, dead, away from the safety of the box we had prepared and placed it in to keep it dry and warm while the sprinklers were set to go off during the night. When we watched the ultrasound of our baby, Matthew kept saying things like “That baby is awesome!” or “She’s so cute!” We are struggling with figuring out a name for this baby, but I will probably ignore Matthew’s suggestions of “Cougar” and “Lightning McQueen.”
Emily will be turning two years old on July 26th. We so enjoy her spunk and charm. She greets her siblings with such enthusiasm and warmth that they all adore her, even when she gets into their things. She will carry on simple conversations by reminding me of things - like the pig-shaped hot air balloon we saw a couple weeks ago, or the baby bird – “Baby bird died. Sad.” Any time someone comes to the door or calls on the phone, she has to know immediately afterward, “Who was that, Mom?” She and Matthew have a sort of love-hate relationship. Many times a day and during her sleep she will say, “Maffew be mean. Maffew hurt me.” But they share a room, and each wants the other in the room at night and they greet each other happily in the morning. Matthew will search for the many stuffed animals Emily likes to carry around the house with her. Emily says the cutest things, like when I was finishing giving Matthew a haircut, “Maffew beautiful!” Speaking of hair – hers is getting long, and she still won’t let me pull it back, so she looks pretty shaggy most of the time (but we still think she’s cute!) Getting Emily to bed has become a struggle since she climbs out of her crib and cries as soon as I put her there unless I have taken the time to cuddle her to sleep beforehand. I enjoy the cuddle time, but sometimes it’s very inconvenient to have to lie down with her when I have other things I need to do and I know I’m going to fall asleep if I stop moving for that long.
I am now about 25 weeks into this pregnancy (15 more to go!) I can feel the baby move quite a bit now, and this is most fun part of the pregnancy for me and the kids as well, as they all want to sit next to me to feel the baby move. We are all excited for her to come, and I am thankful that I am not as nauseated as I was earlier in the pregnancy.
Everything is good – we always seem to keep busy. Hugh is always tired from his early morning commute – but we appreciate how well he takes care of us. We hope all is well with you.
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Ultrasound Picture: It's a ....
GIRL! We are so excited to meet her! And we are grateful that she appears to be healthy.
Monday, May 11, 2009
May update
Wow, has it been a long time since I last wrote! It is too easy to not write, since life is always busy and I don’t enjoy writing. But much has happened over the last three months. Our biggest news is that we are expecting a baby at the end of October. More than with other pregnancies, I feel very much at peace with this. I knew the pregnancy would be hard; I knew another baby would mean more work and more craziness in our household. But neither Hugh nor I felt the peace that we expect to feel when our family is complete, and our kids all hoped and asked often about whether we were going to have more children even though they are now old enough to understand that it means more work for them as well. We all enjoy each other and are glad every person in our family is part of our family (well, most of the time, anyway!) I will admit, once the nausea started about five weeks (three weeks gestation) into the pregnancy, I had to wonder how I forget so quickly how miserable pregnancy can be. Really, I didn’t forget; I guess I just figure it’s worth it, and I must be learning something through the hard times – no matter how it turns out, right? So anyway, we are excited that Heavenly Father will (hopefully) be sending another little spirit to our home about six months from now!
Hugh got through another tax season. It didn’t seem as bad to me since we splurged and got high-speed internet, so Hugh was able to get some work done at home on the weeknights and Saturdays. Hugh was worried about me having to take care of everything on the home front while I was feeling so sick, and it was rough for a month or two, but I do think this pregnancy has been easier so far than the last two were in terms of the severity of the nausea. I’m still nauseated all the time, but it is generally tolerable until evening. I tried to talk the kids out of playing Spring Soccer this year because I remembered how stressful it was trying to get two or three kids to games in different locations at the same time, and having to leave someone at a game alone since I felt like I should attend the game of the youngest child playing at the time. So only Steven and Michael are currently playing soccer, and since Hugh is now available, it is manageable. I enjoy watching them play, especially as they have gotten older and try harder. I have been busy with my responsibilities on the Parent Council at the kids’ school, as well as my church callings. I started reading the Twilight books again after having seen the movie a few weeks ago. I haven’t read much just for fun in my lifetime, (especially not since I started having children) until a few months ago, and I really do enjoy getting into the drama of a good story as well as learning new things in the non-fiction I’ve read lately. I haven’t felt as guilty about lying around reading as I otherwise would since it distracts me from feeling quite so nauseated. I am not as efficient as I used to be, and I’ve given the kids more of the burden of cleaning the house, but I think overall it has been a good thing.
Steven will be turning 14 later this month. Wow! Fortunately, he is still a pleasant, easy-going presence in our home. This semester in school has taught him that he does not want to take two advanced math classes and two sciences at the same time – not that he couldn’t handle it, but because he has to work harder than he wants to! That’s okay- I think life just gets more demanding as you get older, and I want him to have some time for play while he’s still a kid. Steven has learned to write basic programs in his computers class, and he and Daniel have written some silly choose-your-own-adventure-type programs. Steven has accompanied his Intermediate Orchestra class on the piano for a couple of the numbers in the last couple of concerts, and it has been good practice for him to play through his mistakes, as I’m hoping he is learning to do so that someday he will be able to put his talents to use playing the hymns at church. Steven still enjoys reading (though I have a hard time finding books within his preferred genre he hasn’t read yet), playing electronics (though we have had to cut back on that when he hasn’t kept his grades up), getting together with friends (though that is sometimes hard since most of his school friends live in other cities,) and playing soccer (he asked me to add!)
Of all our kids, Daniel is the most certain that we have two more spirits waiting to join our family, so he was thrilled when I announced the news that we are having a baby. He recently became very frustrated with piano again and begged me to let him quit, giving me the analogy of being forced to run a race he never even wanted to enter. I sympathized with him, but then extended the analogy with myself as the coach/parent, looking at my young son with underdeveloped muscles and limited lung capacity, and, knowing that he will have many hard times in his life, I decided to require him to run this race because he will be stronger and better prepared in the end whether or not he wanted to run it at the time. So he is now working hard at learning the hymns, which is the “finish line” of this race! When Alyssa mentioned that a girl in her class was giving away puppies, Daniel became obsessed with getting a dog. He even asked whether it would help his case if he started changing diapers. He has researched breeds online and he and Julia are begging me to give in. I told them that the only way I will consent is if they show me, consistently and over time, that they will fulfill their responsibilities at home (chores and piano practice) even when the excitement of the goal wears off. Like Steven, Daniel accepted the challenge to accompany the elementary orchestra on the piano, and though his first run through was “scary and embarrassing”, he has improved a ton in the two days since he got the sheet music and I think he will do just fine in the performance for the whole school in a few days.
I appreciate Julia being a “self-starter” when it comes to completing a school project (even if it is the night before it is due) and cooking breakfasts and baking treats for the family. She has courage when it comes to taking on challenging tasks, like playing a difficult piano piece or wrestling Emily into her car seat. She has been somewhat argumentative and petty in her interactions with her younger siblings lately; hopefully we can get it under control before school is out (when the opportunities for conflict will be multiplied.) In general, the kids really do get along well, so I try to point out to them how much happier we all feel when we are being kind and trying our best not to be offended by each other. She has enjoyed socializing with some of her school friends after school more in the last couple of months.
It has been so much fun to watch Michael play soccer this season. When I asked him why he is so much better this year, he responded simply, “Effort.” He has been much more pleasant in general lately, though he often skips doing his chore or piano even though he is not supposed to be able to eat dinner until his things are done (which he often gets away with when I am too preoccupied to check up on him.) Michael turned nine years old on April 4th, and most of his siblings gave him candy. After noticing that he had neglected to do his chores and skipped dinner for most of a week, I finally clued in to the reason it was possible he could be alive while eating so little, and confiscated the remainder of his birthday candy. I am such a mean mom. Michael ran a one-mile fun run with the Wrights and did well even though he has not run long distances more than a few times. He is outwardly shy and serious, but has a lot of confidence even in his unexplored abilities and doesn’t hesitate to take on challenges that appeal to him.
Alyssa has done better this semester with going to school, but her personality seems to have changed. She is more defiant and impulsive, still needy and complaining often of headaches and stomachaches. (If you have any insights into the psychology of what might be going on, please share them - I really want to understand so that I know how to help her!) She and Natalie finished their Let’s Play Music class and while they are glad to be done for the school year and have a break, I’m glad that we participated because I think it has given them a good foundation in music theory. She and Natalie had planned to put on a talent show for their friends and family today, but since I wasn’t clear on the format or content, (much to their dismay) I wouldn’t extend invitations to anyone outside of our immediate family.
Natalie has done so well during the last few months at preschool with mastering all the prescribed skills, including reading. I think it has become a competition between her and a boy at the preschool who started bringing books home at the same time as she did. She often helps me with chores in the mornings after we take the older kids to school. I am so amused by her five year-old rationale: the last few times Hugh has given her baths she insists that he go out while she gets undressed and into the bathtub (as if he won’t see her naked little body the whole time he is bathing her!) She has tried to be more pleasant and helpful, though sometimes her angry monster voice sneaks out and I have to shake my head and wonder how such a cute little person can make such mean sounds. Both Natalie and Alyssa love to play with their cousin, Josie, and they wish their cousins were still attending the charter school with them.
I have been working hard with Matthew to get him out of the habit of whining and demanding things. He can still be pretty melodramatic and over-reactive, like when he throws himself across the room after being nudged or even offended by someone, acting as if that person has inflicted brutal force on him. But I have to say that his enthusiasm is his most charming characteristic. It is gratifying to hear his animated “Woo-hoo!” or “Yes!” when he sees a tractor while we’re out driving, or when someone finds one of his Cars cars (Lightning McQueen or Mater), or when we’re having something he likes to eat. Despite the many bribes we have offered him, he still wants nothing to do with potty-training. I really want to have him trained before this new baby comes, and with any luck, Emily might learn if she watches Matthew. Matthew turns on the TV every chance he gets (and has gotten away with it more since I have not been feeling well) and I sometimes feel guilty about that. We recently started making Matthew take off his Speed Racer hat indoors when it occurred to me that his brain might develop a blind spot where the visor blocks his vision 24 hours a day. Matthew really likes Emily but he is often too rough with her and kisses or hugs her when she does not want his affection, so she gets edgy whenever he gets too close. Matthew and Emily both prefer their dad over me, which somehow I am okay with. (Maybe it’s because sometimes they insist that he change their diapers…)
Emily, 21 months old now, is such a little person. She talks well and understands a lot. She observes and imitates what she sees, which is great - like when she says “Bless you!” when someone sneezes, or when she folds her arms for the prayer, and bad - like when she is angry with me and yells, “Stupid Mom!” or “Bad Mom!” She is very affectionate – she gives lots of hugs and kisses (sloppy, right-on-the-lips kisses, which are gross since she has had a cold/runny nose for most of the last three months.) She is curious and independent, and I often find her pulling chairs and stools around the house to get into things she shouldn’t. She is cute, but often looks very scrappy with her hair in her face (since she will not let me pull it back) and food on her clothes and face (because she feeds herself and her accuracy with utensils is not so great.) But she has a fun personality and we all delight in watching her learn new things. We had to come up with a seating schedule because the kids all fight over the opportunity to sit next to Emily going to and from school. She loves to jump and run and play outside, but usually insists that one of her adoring siblings (who are easy to persuade) go with her to play outside.
Life is busy but good. We are excited for the end of school in a couple of weeks. We aren’t planning any long trips this summer since I don’t think I’ll be up for it, but we’ll do some fun day trips and outings. We hope you are happy and well.
Hugh got through another tax season. It didn’t seem as bad to me since we splurged and got high-speed internet, so Hugh was able to get some work done at home on the weeknights and Saturdays. Hugh was worried about me having to take care of everything on the home front while I was feeling so sick, and it was rough for a month or two, but I do think this pregnancy has been easier so far than the last two were in terms of the severity of the nausea. I’m still nauseated all the time, but it is generally tolerable until evening. I tried to talk the kids out of playing Spring Soccer this year because I remembered how stressful it was trying to get two or three kids to games in different locations at the same time, and having to leave someone at a game alone since I felt like I should attend the game of the youngest child playing at the time. So only Steven and Michael are currently playing soccer, and since Hugh is now available, it is manageable. I enjoy watching them play, especially as they have gotten older and try harder. I have been busy with my responsibilities on the Parent Council at the kids’ school, as well as my church callings. I started reading the Twilight books again after having seen the movie a few weeks ago. I haven’t read much just for fun in my lifetime, (especially not since I started having children) until a few months ago, and I really do enjoy getting into the drama of a good story as well as learning new things in the non-fiction I’ve read lately. I haven’t felt as guilty about lying around reading as I otherwise would since it distracts me from feeling quite so nauseated. I am not as efficient as I used to be, and I’ve given the kids more of the burden of cleaning the house, but I think overall it has been a good thing.
Steven will be turning 14 later this month. Wow! Fortunately, he is still a pleasant, easy-going presence in our home. This semester in school has taught him that he does not want to take two advanced math classes and two sciences at the same time – not that he couldn’t handle it, but because he has to work harder than he wants to! That’s okay- I think life just gets more demanding as you get older, and I want him to have some time for play while he’s still a kid. Steven has learned to write basic programs in his computers class, and he and Daniel have written some silly choose-your-own-adventure-type programs. Steven has accompanied his Intermediate Orchestra class on the piano for a couple of the numbers in the last couple of concerts, and it has been good practice for him to play through his mistakes, as I’m hoping he is learning to do so that someday he will be able to put his talents to use playing the hymns at church. Steven still enjoys reading (though I have a hard time finding books within his preferred genre he hasn’t read yet), playing electronics (though we have had to cut back on that when he hasn’t kept his grades up), getting together with friends (though that is sometimes hard since most of his school friends live in other cities,) and playing soccer (he asked me to add!)
Of all our kids, Daniel is the most certain that we have two more spirits waiting to join our family, so he was thrilled when I announced the news that we are having a baby. He recently became very frustrated with piano again and begged me to let him quit, giving me the analogy of being forced to run a race he never even wanted to enter. I sympathized with him, but then extended the analogy with myself as the coach/parent, looking at my young son with underdeveloped muscles and limited lung capacity, and, knowing that he will have many hard times in his life, I decided to require him to run this race because he will be stronger and better prepared in the end whether or not he wanted to run it at the time. So he is now working hard at learning the hymns, which is the “finish line” of this race! When Alyssa mentioned that a girl in her class was giving away puppies, Daniel became obsessed with getting a dog. He even asked whether it would help his case if he started changing diapers. He has researched breeds online and he and Julia are begging me to give in. I told them that the only way I will consent is if they show me, consistently and over time, that they will fulfill their responsibilities at home (chores and piano practice) even when the excitement of the goal wears off. Like Steven, Daniel accepted the challenge to accompany the elementary orchestra on the piano, and though his first run through was “scary and embarrassing”, he has improved a ton in the two days since he got the sheet music and I think he will do just fine in the performance for the whole school in a few days.
I appreciate Julia being a “self-starter” when it comes to completing a school project (even if it is the night before it is due) and cooking breakfasts and baking treats for the family. She has courage when it comes to taking on challenging tasks, like playing a difficult piano piece or wrestling Emily into her car seat. She has been somewhat argumentative and petty in her interactions with her younger siblings lately; hopefully we can get it under control before school is out (when the opportunities for conflict will be multiplied.) In general, the kids really do get along well, so I try to point out to them how much happier we all feel when we are being kind and trying our best not to be offended by each other. She has enjoyed socializing with some of her school friends after school more in the last couple of months.
It has been so much fun to watch Michael play soccer this season. When I asked him why he is so much better this year, he responded simply, “Effort.” He has been much more pleasant in general lately, though he often skips doing his chore or piano even though he is not supposed to be able to eat dinner until his things are done (which he often gets away with when I am too preoccupied to check up on him.) Michael turned nine years old on April 4th, and most of his siblings gave him candy. After noticing that he had neglected to do his chores and skipped dinner for most of a week, I finally clued in to the reason it was possible he could be alive while eating so little, and confiscated the remainder of his birthday candy. I am such a mean mom. Michael ran a one-mile fun run with the Wrights and did well even though he has not run long distances more than a few times. He is outwardly shy and serious, but has a lot of confidence even in his unexplored abilities and doesn’t hesitate to take on challenges that appeal to him.
Alyssa has done better this semester with going to school, but her personality seems to have changed. She is more defiant and impulsive, still needy and complaining often of headaches and stomachaches. (If you have any insights into the psychology of what might be going on, please share them - I really want to understand so that I know how to help her!) She and Natalie finished their Let’s Play Music class and while they are glad to be done for the school year and have a break, I’m glad that we participated because I think it has given them a good foundation in music theory. She and Natalie had planned to put on a talent show for their friends and family today, but since I wasn’t clear on the format or content, (much to their dismay) I wouldn’t extend invitations to anyone outside of our immediate family.
Natalie has done so well during the last few months at preschool with mastering all the prescribed skills, including reading. I think it has become a competition between her and a boy at the preschool who started bringing books home at the same time as she did. She often helps me with chores in the mornings after we take the older kids to school. I am so amused by her five year-old rationale: the last few times Hugh has given her baths she insists that he go out while she gets undressed and into the bathtub (as if he won’t see her naked little body the whole time he is bathing her!) She has tried to be more pleasant and helpful, though sometimes her angry monster voice sneaks out and I have to shake my head and wonder how such a cute little person can make such mean sounds. Both Natalie and Alyssa love to play with their cousin, Josie, and they wish their cousins were still attending the charter school with them.
I have been working hard with Matthew to get him out of the habit of whining and demanding things. He can still be pretty melodramatic and over-reactive, like when he throws himself across the room after being nudged or even offended by someone, acting as if that person has inflicted brutal force on him. But I have to say that his enthusiasm is his most charming characteristic. It is gratifying to hear his animated “Woo-hoo!” or “Yes!” when he sees a tractor while we’re out driving, or when someone finds one of his Cars cars (Lightning McQueen or Mater), or when we’re having something he likes to eat. Despite the many bribes we have offered him, he still wants nothing to do with potty-training. I really want to have him trained before this new baby comes, and with any luck, Emily might learn if she watches Matthew. Matthew turns on the TV every chance he gets (and has gotten away with it more since I have not been feeling well) and I sometimes feel guilty about that. We recently started making Matthew take off his Speed Racer hat indoors when it occurred to me that his brain might develop a blind spot where the visor blocks his vision 24 hours a day. Matthew really likes Emily but he is often too rough with her and kisses or hugs her when she does not want his affection, so she gets edgy whenever he gets too close. Matthew and Emily both prefer their dad over me, which somehow I am okay with. (Maybe it’s because sometimes they insist that he change their diapers…)
Emily, 21 months old now, is such a little person. She talks well and understands a lot. She observes and imitates what she sees, which is great - like when she says “Bless you!” when someone sneezes, or when she folds her arms for the prayer, and bad - like when she is angry with me and yells, “Stupid Mom!” or “Bad Mom!” She is very affectionate – she gives lots of hugs and kisses (sloppy, right-on-the-lips kisses, which are gross since she has had a cold/runny nose for most of the last three months.) She is curious and independent, and I often find her pulling chairs and stools around the house to get into things she shouldn’t. She is cute, but often looks very scrappy with her hair in her face (since she will not let me pull it back) and food on her clothes and face (because she feeds herself and her accuracy with utensils is not so great.) But she has a fun personality and we all delight in watching her learn new things. We had to come up with a seating schedule because the kids all fight over the opportunity to sit next to Emily going to and from school. She loves to jump and run and play outside, but usually insists that one of her adoring siblings (who are easy to persuade) go with her to play outside.
Life is busy but good. We are excited for the end of school in a couple of weeks. We aren’t planning any long trips this summer since I don’t think I’ll be up for it, but we’ll do some fun day trips and outings. We hope you are happy and well.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Now that it's almost Valentine's Day...We had a wonderful Christmas. The kids had a full two weeks off of school, and while we spent more than half of the first week finishing up getting ready for Christmas, we had plenty of time to just be together. We went sledding several times, watched a couple of movies, and played lots of games together. We even got to have Hugh around for about half of the time. We never run out of things to do, but it was getting to the point after about a week and a half that I was feeling like we needed a bit more structure to make sure we were actually accomplishing something.
I mentioned something to my parents recently that captures my feelings perfectly: Life seems to jog along at a pace just a little faster than I can keep up with! But I need to be careful about how often I express that to our kids. I realized this while I was reading Alyssa’s school journal in which she talked about not having enough time to build snowmen because she and her brothers and sisters are just always too busy(!)
Steven would tell you that the biggest news I could possibly report is that we got a Nintendo Wii. (Notice my enthusiasm) Especially after their Wright cousins received a Wii for Christmas, my kids were certain that they were the only kids they knew who didn’t yet have one. They had been saving for months to buy a Wii (and would be for years if they were ever to earn the $350-400), and so as part of their Christmas presents we gave them $75 seed money. Steven grabbed every opportunity to do extra chores, including shoveling our driveway and sidewalk (and many of the neighbors’!) every time it snowed (which has been often) in order to earn some extra money. So, long story a little shorter, they ended up getting a good deal on eBay and scraping together enough money from their piggy banks, allowance, and extra chores to pay for it. I applaud them for working at it together, but I must admit I had hoped it would take them a little longer so that they would solidify some good work habits while earning it. Anyway, they are enjoying it and do a lot of extra chores and piano practice in order to earn electronics time during the week (beyond their three hours early Saturday mornings.) The good news about Steven is that he is still a very pleasant, respectful, intelligent kid; the bad news is that he is still failing to be conscientious about fulfilling his responsibilities at school, at church, and sometimes at home. I don’t want to harp on him because he really is basically a good kid, but I realize that we are doing him no favors by allowing him to neglect his responsibilities now – the consequences will only get bigger as he gets older. What to do, what to do…such is the ongoing challenge of being a good parent!
Though he insisted he didn’t care about getting a Wii since he has his Nintendo DS, Daniel has enjoyed having the Wii, and like Steven, constantly looks for ways to earn extra time playing it. I so enjoy hearing Steven and Daniel play lively duets on the piano. It’s a shame they don’t enjoy it more themselves, because it is great fun to listen to. Being the mean mom I am, I recently forced Steven and Daniel to go on a Boy Scout Klondike (winter campout) in an abandoned railroad tunnel. No amount of reasoning with the boys persuaded them that they should go until I said that I don’t want my boys to be wusses. I really hate sending my children off – to school, to a friend’s house, on a campout, whatever – unless I know that they are in good hands. I had to keep reminding myself of that as I imagined them bumping into a bear or a cougar or some other unfriendly animal also seeking shelter in the tunnel, or shivering and miserable, unable to keep warm. They were cold, but they survived it just fine. Since Daniel turned 12 in October, he has really taken his responsibilities as a deacon and a holder of the Aaronic Priesthood seriously. It has strengthened his testimony to be able to serve, and even to fast once a month (even though it is hard and none of us enjoy it.)
Julia loves the art class she started this semester. She is a good little artist, and even more than that, she is not afraid to try new things. She takes on challenges fearlessly. You can see that in the way she takes on new piano pieces that stretch her tiny hands and require them to fly up and down the keyboard. She enjoys science (chemistry, at the moment) and etymology (word origins). It is just about impossible to get her do something she doesn’t want to do, but she can do just about anything competently. She has a great teacher at school who is helping her class to write and perform an opera later this month, as well as to perform Romeo and Juliet next month. After more than two years of saving (and waiting for her mom to research it,) Julia finally purchased a microscope. The kids were all pretty fascinated with it for the first week or so, but haven’t done much with it since.
Michael is the only one of our kids involved in sports right now (sigh of relief). He plays basketball twice a week and enjoys it. He misses being able to go outside and throw his football up on the roof since everything has been covered with snow for two months now. Steven, Daniel, and Michael all won their class spelling bees last month and ended up competing against each other in the school spelling bee. Steven ended up tying for third, and Michael ended up in second place (and the alternate to compete in the Daily Herald Bee.) His teacher raves about how brilliant he is and what an angel he is in class (which is nice to hear, since he can be a challenge at home.) Thankfully, he seems to have plenty of friends now (which was a concern to us at the beginning of the school year.)
Alyssa turned 7 on January 22nd. We accidentally started a tradition sometime within the last couple of years that the birthday kid gets to choose an activity we do together as a family. She chose what is one of our kids’ favorite spots: Jumpin’ Jacks, a warehouse full of huge inflatable fun-house slides/trampolines. Alyssa complains often of headaches or nausea or some other pain, and I always wonder how much of it is legitimate physical ailments and how much of it is psychosomatic. If it is the latter, there should be something we can do about it to keep her from feeling she needs an ailment to get attention… I really do like Alyssa; she is sweet, affectionate, generally pleasant, and smart. I wonder what she needs? Thank goodness she has a warm, conscientious teacher and kind classmates.
That little whippersnapper Natalie is such a cute girl, but goodness has she been a bear lately! She is grumpy and yells often, and therefore has ended up in time out in the (locked) bathroom a lot. She found a crayon and a pen once while she was in there and took the opportunity to scribble all over the wall and tear up the wall board with the sharp point of the pen. Unfortunately, within a couple days of the time I repaired and repainted the wall, she found a way to do it again. She is finally catching on to reading, and while it is still tedious and requires a lot of effort, at least she knows she can do it. Natalie has spent more time working on preschool/kindergarten workbooks, and I think that has helped her with reading as well as developing better fine motor dexterity.
Of all our kids, I have to monitor TV time most closely with Matthew. I find him plopped down on the floor watching it probably a five times a day. He always watches PBS, but still, I want him using his brain in creative play instead of being passively entertained. He plays mostly with his cars and wooden train set, and lately has enjoyed coloring his Speed Racer coloring books and pretending to prepare food with the toy food and dishes. He is making Michael crazy because he keeps taking his little over-the-door basketball hoop so that he can play with it. Since he turned three in November, he started attending Primary at church. He misses being in Nursery, and told me repeatedly, “I don’t want to be big! I want to be small! I don’t want to go to Primary!” But he seems to have adjusted okay. He has a couple of friends with whom he asks to play almost daily.
My baby is eighteen months old now (and I’m not even pregnant!) Really, I can’t believe how quickly the time goes. It is so fun to watch our children’s personalities and talents and interests emerge. It is an amazing thing when you have a new little baby, to love this little person even though you have no idea who he or she is, and to watch each one of them learn. Of course, it can be tiring and exasperating, as you also learn that they have their own wills and make their own decisions, and make lots of mistakes and messes. Emily is so much fun; having her is twice as much fun because all her siblings adore her, too. She is curious and inquisitive and into everything. She steals candy, she writes all over herself (especially on her face and neck) any time she finds a marker or pen handy, she unzips the pockets of my purse and raids my makeup and gum, she pulls stacks of books off shelves almost daily. She walks around the house with hats and bracelets and purses, and bounces/jogs around the house trying to look like she doesn’t know how cute she is. She delights us all now that she can talk; she will at least try to mimic just about anything we ask her to say, and she will spontaneously name things she recognizes in our daily activities. We love her sweet greetings and hugs and kisses.
Tax season hasn’t been bad yet, but Hugh says it’s going to start being very busy next week. Hugh and I have had dental woes in the last couple of months: Hugh went in to get a root canal, the dentist drilled through his tooth and missed the canal completely, so had to cut the tooth in half, pull the damaged half, check and recheck multiple times to ensure that it was healing properly, and finally make a special crown with a metal piece to support the half-tooth that is left. Of course, he had to juggle his work schedule in order to make each of these 4 or 5 follow-up appointments. Even I, with my embarrassingly vast dental experience, had never heard of such a thing happening. As for me, I had to go to the dentist twice in five days for a root canal and a cracked tooth. But at least we have dentists, and insurance, and enough money to help us deal with all our tooth problems!
I could probably go on, but you and I both have other things we need to do! Hope you are well and happy!
I mentioned something to my parents recently that captures my feelings perfectly: Life seems to jog along at a pace just a little faster than I can keep up with! But I need to be careful about how often I express that to our kids. I realized this while I was reading Alyssa’s school journal in which she talked about not having enough time to build snowmen because she and her brothers and sisters are just always too busy(!)
Steven would tell you that the biggest news I could possibly report is that we got a Nintendo Wii. (Notice my enthusiasm) Especially after their Wright cousins received a Wii for Christmas, my kids were certain that they were the only kids they knew who didn’t yet have one. They had been saving for months to buy a Wii (and would be for years if they were ever to earn the $350-400), and so as part of their Christmas presents we gave them $75 seed money. Steven grabbed every opportunity to do extra chores, including shoveling our driveway and sidewalk (and many of the neighbors’!) every time it snowed (which has been often) in order to earn some extra money. So, long story a little shorter, they ended up getting a good deal on eBay and scraping together enough money from their piggy banks, allowance, and extra chores to pay for it. I applaud them for working at it together, but I must admit I had hoped it would take them a little longer so that they would solidify some good work habits while earning it. Anyway, they are enjoying it and do a lot of extra chores and piano practice in order to earn electronics time during the week (beyond their three hours early Saturday mornings.) The good news about Steven is that he is still a very pleasant, respectful, intelligent kid; the bad news is that he is still failing to be conscientious about fulfilling his responsibilities at school, at church, and sometimes at home. I don’t want to harp on him because he really is basically a good kid, but I realize that we are doing him no favors by allowing him to neglect his responsibilities now – the consequences will only get bigger as he gets older. What to do, what to do…such is the ongoing challenge of being a good parent!
Though he insisted he didn’t care about getting a Wii since he has his Nintendo DS, Daniel has enjoyed having the Wii, and like Steven, constantly looks for ways to earn extra time playing it. I so enjoy hearing Steven and Daniel play lively duets on the piano. It’s a shame they don’t enjoy it more themselves, because it is great fun to listen to. Being the mean mom I am, I recently forced Steven and Daniel to go on a Boy Scout Klondike (winter campout) in an abandoned railroad tunnel. No amount of reasoning with the boys persuaded them that they should go until I said that I don’t want my boys to be wusses. I really hate sending my children off – to school, to a friend’s house, on a campout, whatever – unless I know that they are in good hands. I had to keep reminding myself of that as I imagined them bumping into a bear or a cougar or some other unfriendly animal also seeking shelter in the tunnel, or shivering and miserable, unable to keep warm. They were cold, but they survived it just fine. Since Daniel turned 12 in October, he has really taken his responsibilities as a deacon and a holder of the Aaronic Priesthood seriously. It has strengthened his testimony to be able to serve, and even to fast once a month (even though it is hard and none of us enjoy it.)
Julia loves the art class she started this semester. She is a good little artist, and even more than that, she is not afraid to try new things. She takes on challenges fearlessly. You can see that in the way she takes on new piano pieces that stretch her tiny hands and require them to fly up and down the keyboard. She enjoys science (chemistry, at the moment) and etymology (word origins). It is just about impossible to get her do something she doesn’t want to do, but she can do just about anything competently. She has a great teacher at school who is helping her class to write and perform an opera later this month, as well as to perform Romeo and Juliet next month. After more than two years of saving (and waiting for her mom to research it,) Julia finally purchased a microscope. The kids were all pretty fascinated with it for the first week or so, but haven’t done much with it since.
Michael is the only one of our kids involved in sports right now (sigh of relief). He plays basketball twice a week and enjoys it. He misses being able to go outside and throw his football up on the roof since everything has been covered with snow for two months now. Steven, Daniel, and Michael all won their class spelling bees last month and ended up competing against each other in the school spelling bee. Steven ended up tying for third, and Michael ended up in second place (and the alternate to compete in the Daily Herald Bee.) His teacher raves about how brilliant he is and what an angel he is in class (which is nice to hear, since he can be a challenge at home.) Thankfully, he seems to have plenty of friends now (which was a concern to us at the beginning of the school year.)
Alyssa turned 7 on January 22nd. We accidentally started a tradition sometime within the last couple of years that the birthday kid gets to choose an activity we do together as a family. She chose what is one of our kids’ favorite spots: Jumpin’ Jacks, a warehouse full of huge inflatable fun-house slides/trampolines. Alyssa complains often of headaches or nausea or some other pain, and I always wonder how much of it is legitimate physical ailments and how much of it is psychosomatic. If it is the latter, there should be something we can do about it to keep her from feeling she needs an ailment to get attention… I really do like Alyssa; she is sweet, affectionate, generally pleasant, and smart. I wonder what she needs? Thank goodness she has a warm, conscientious teacher and kind classmates.
That little whippersnapper Natalie is such a cute girl, but goodness has she been a bear lately! She is grumpy and yells often, and therefore has ended up in time out in the (locked) bathroom a lot. She found a crayon and a pen once while she was in there and took the opportunity to scribble all over the wall and tear up the wall board with the sharp point of the pen. Unfortunately, within a couple days of the time I repaired and repainted the wall, she found a way to do it again. She is finally catching on to reading, and while it is still tedious and requires a lot of effort, at least she knows she can do it. Natalie has spent more time working on preschool/kindergarten workbooks, and I think that has helped her with reading as well as developing better fine motor dexterity.
Of all our kids, I have to monitor TV time most closely with Matthew. I find him plopped down on the floor watching it probably a five times a day. He always watches PBS, but still, I want him using his brain in creative play instead of being passively entertained. He plays mostly with his cars and wooden train set, and lately has enjoyed coloring his Speed Racer coloring books and pretending to prepare food with the toy food and dishes. He is making Michael crazy because he keeps taking his little over-the-door basketball hoop so that he can play with it. Since he turned three in November, he started attending Primary at church. He misses being in Nursery, and told me repeatedly, “I don’t want to be big! I want to be small! I don’t want to go to Primary!” But he seems to have adjusted okay. He has a couple of friends with whom he asks to play almost daily.
My baby is eighteen months old now (and I’m not even pregnant!) Really, I can’t believe how quickly the time goes. It is so fun to watch our children’s personalities and talents and interests emerge. It is an amazing thing when you have a new little baby, to love this little person even though you have no idea who he or she is, and to watch each one of them learn. Of course, it can be tiring and exasperating, as you also learn that they have their own wills and make their own decisions, and make lots of mistakes and messes. Emily is so much fun; having her is twice as much fun because all her siblings adore her, too. She is curious and inquisitive and into everything. She steals candy, she writes all over herself (especially on her face and neck) any time she finds a marker or pen handy, she unzips the pockets of my purse and raids my makeup and gum, she pulls stacks of books off shelves almost daily. She walks around the house with hats and bracelets and purses, and bounces/jogs around the house trying to look like she doesn’t know how cute she is. She delights us all now that she can talk; she will at least try to mimic just about anything we ask her to say, and she will spontaneously name things she recognizes in our daily activities. We love her sweet greetings and hugs and kisses.
Tax season hasn’t been bad yet, but Hugh says it’s going to start being very busy next week. Hugh and I have had dental woes in the last couple of months: Hugh went in to get a root canal, the dentist drilled through his tooth and missed the canal completely, so had to cut the tooth in half, pull the damaged half, check and recheck multiple times to ensure that it was healing properly, and finally make a special crown with a metal piece to support the half-tooth that is left. Of course, he had to juggle his work schedule in order to make each of these 4 or 5 follow-up appointments. Even I, with my embarrassingly vast dental experience, had never heard of such a thing happening. As for me, I had to go to the dentist twice in five days for a root canal and a cracked tooth. But at least we have dentists, and insurance, and enough money to help us deal with all our tooth problems!
I could probably go on, but you and I both have other things we need to do! Hope you are well and happy!
Saturday, December 27, 2008
Christmas 2008
I can hardly believe another year has passed – as the old saying goes, time flies when you’re having fun! Life is good; we are very blessed.
We are approaching ten years of living in our home here in Utah, and we still enjoy very much our community and friends here. Hugh is still commuting to Salt Lake City for work, though he now has permission to work occasionally from home, so he is getting a little more sleep.
As for me, I love being a mom. Admittedly, I don’t enjoy every second of it – I could do without endless chores, stinky diapers, and squabbling – but I really do love being a mom and I am so grateful for every one of our children. My greatest challenges are having the wisdom to know what things are most important, and then having the time (and energy) to fit it all in! Our older five kids attend a charter school, and while it takes a considerable amount of time and commitment on my part, for the first time I feel at peace with the education our children are acquiring.
Our family adventures this year included a family reunion with all our Dosdall kin (all twelve of my siblings!) at Bear Lake, Utah in late June for one last hurrah before my dear parents left for Bangalore, India to serve an 18-month humanitarian mission at an orphanage supported by our church. We also were able to visit Disneyland for the first time as a family along with my sister, Kristen, and her family.
We entered a new era as Steven turned 13 in May this year. He is a pleasant, down-to-earth kid. We hope that he will keep that quiet confidence and goodness that are his with him all through his teenage years! He plays violin in the school orchestra and is still taking piano lessons. Much to his delight, Steven recently passed me up in height. Steven enjoys soccer, reading, playing with friends, and negotiating for as much time to play electronics as he possibly can.
Daniel turned 12 in October and became a deacon in our church, which has given him opportunities for more service and responsibility. Daniel has a great sense of humor and a tender heart. After faithfully saving his pennies for nine months, Daniel accomplished his goal of purchasing a Nintendo DS. He and Steven are enjoying the fruits of his labors. Despite dragging their feet when it comes time to practice, Steven and Daniel are becoming quite the pianists and it is fun to listen to the lively duets they play.
Julia turned 10 in July and is a very musical little person. She enjoys BYU sports, concerts with her dad on Temple Square, soccer, Sudoku, playing the piano, reading, and drawing. She has experimented in the kitchen enough that she can follow a recipe pretty much without my help from start to finish. (Cleaning up the mess in the kitchen, now that’s another matter entirely…)
Michael, who turned 8 in April, is all about school and sports. He played soccer and flag football this year and is just beginning the basketball season. Though he is young for a 4th grader, he is doing well and is enjoying school. He loves his cousin, Guts, and is so glad that the Wrights moved here to Spanish Fork this year. Michael is a talented writer and pianist, though he is very shy about showing off these talents.
Alyssa, who will be turning 7 in January, is our little home-body. It has been a rough few years since she started preschool as separation anxiety has been a major issue. To make a long story short: things are much improved after a few sessions with a pediatric therapist who helped me understand how I was contributing to her insecurity. (Lest I start thinking I know anything, my children are there to humble me!) She has been helped a lot by the teachers and administration as well as her fellow 1st graders. Alyssa is occasionally grumpy and obstinate, but more often very sweet, generous, and helpful. She is a pretty girl who likes pretty things and notices style and details (I don’t know yet if this is a good thing or a bad thing…)
Natalie, who just turned 5, is an interesting little person. Sometimes she is sweet as sugar, but then other times it shocks me to hear the mean, angry sounds that come out of such a pretty, innocent-looking face. She has unintentionally given her little brother an arsenal of mean names to call us when we displease him. She has a way with words, and recently came up with the ultimate insult by calling Matthew “Math-Ute” (the U of U Utes are BYU’s arch-rival.) She goes around the house showing off her new skills of whistling and snapping. She is a cute, spunky little person.
Matthew, who just turned 3, loves things that go. His favorite toys are Hot Wheels cars, a wooden train set, and puzzles, movies, and books about cars, trucks, tractors, machines, etc. He wears his beloved Speed Racer hat nearly 24 hours a day, allowing us to take it off only when he takes a bath, has his picture taken, or goes to church. He is becoming much more verbal, but sometimes we wish we had an interpreter to help us understand what he is trying to say, which I’m sure is frustrating to him. He can be difficult and demanding, but he is precious and has an adorably expressive face and voice.
Emily, our baby, is not really a baby anymore. Almost 17 months old now, she is constantly running, climbing, pulling chairs and stools around the house in order to reach all kinds of dangerous or messy things. Emily talks little but understands a lot. She loves her siblings and they love her. It is truly delightful to have a baby, especially with a house full of adoring siblings.
We are so grateful for you, our friends and family, and for the peace we have in our lives because of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and his wonderful Gospel. We pray that you are well and happy and can see the hand of the Lord in your lives through your good times as well as your challenges.
We are approaching ten years of living in our home here in Utah, and we still enjoy very much our community and friends here. Hugh is still commuting to Salt Lake City for work, though he now has permission to work occasionally from home, so he is getting a little more sleep.
As for me, I love being a mom. Admittedly, I don’t enjoy every second of it – I could do without endless chores, stinky diapers, and squabbling – but I really do love being a mom and I am so grateful for every one of our children. My greatest challenges are having the wisdom to know what things are most important, and then having the time (and energy) to fit it all in! Our older five kids attend a charter school, and while it takes a considerable amount of time and commitment on my part, for the first time I feel at peace with the education our children are acquiring.
Our family adventures this year included a family reunion with all our Dosdall kin (all twelve of my siblings!) at Bear Lake, Utah in late June for one last hurrah before my dear parents left for Bangalore, India to serve an 18-month humanitarian mission at an orphanage supported by our church. We also were able to visit Disneyland for the first time as a family along with my sister, Kristen, and her family.
We entered a new era as Steven turned 13 in May this year. He is a pleasant, down-to-earth kid. We hope that he will keep that quiet confidence and goodness that are his with him all through his teenage years! He plays violin in the school orchestra and is still taking piano lessons. Much to his delight, Steven recently passed me up in height. Steven enjoys soccer, reading, playing with friends, and negotiating for as much time to play electronics as he possibly can.
Daniel turned 12 in October and became a deacon in our church, which has given him opportunities for more service and responsibility. Daniel has a great sense of humor and a tender heart. After faithfully saving his pennies for nine months, Daniel accomplished his goal of purchasing a Nintendo DS. He and Steven are enjoying the fruits of his labors. Despite dragging their feet when it comes time to practice, Steven and Daniel are becoming quite the pianists and it is fun to listen to the lively duets they play.
Julia turned 10 in July and is a very musical little person. She enjoys BYU sports, concerts with her dad on Temple Square, soccer, Sudoku, playing the piano, reading, and drawing. She has experimented in the kitchen enough that she can follow a recipe pretty much without my help from start to finish. (Cleaning up the mess in the kitchen, now that’s another matter entirely…)
Michael, who turned 8 in April, is all about school and sports. He played soccer and flag football this year and is just beginning the basketball season. Though he is young for a 4th grader, he is doing well and is enjoying school. He loves his cousin, Guts, and is so glad that the Wrights moved here to Spanish Fork this year. Michael is a talented writer and pianist, though he is very shy about showing off these talents.
Alyssa, who will be turning 7 in January, is our little home-body. It has been a rough few years since she started preschool as separation anxiety has been a major issue. To make a long story short: things are much improved after a few sessions with a pediatric therapist who helped me understand how I was contributing to her insecurity. (Lest I start thinking I know anything, my children are there to humble me!) She has been helped a lot by the teachers and administration as well as her fellow 1st graders. Alyssa is occasionally grumpy and obstinate, but more often very sweet, generous, and helpful. She is a pretty girl who likes pretty things and notices style and details (I don’t know yet if this is a good thing or a bad thing…)
Natalie, who just turned 5, is an interesting little person. Sometimes she is sweet as sugar, but then other times it shocks me to hear the mean, angry sounds that come out of such a pretty, innocent-looking face. She has unintentionally given her little brother an arsenal of mean names to call us when we displease him. She has a way with words, and recently came up with the ultimate insult by calling Matthew “Math-Ute” (the U of U Utes are BYU’s arch-rival.) She goes around the house showing off her new skills of whistling and snapping. She is a cute, spunky little person.
Matthew, who just turned 3, loves things that go. His favorite toys are Hot Wheels cars, a wooden train set, and puzzles, movies, and books about cars, trucks, tractors, machines, etc. He wears his beloved Speed Racer hat nearly 24 hours a day, allowing us to take it off only when he takes a bath, has his picture taken, or goes to church. He is becoming much more verbal, but sometimes we wish we had an interpreter to help us understand what he is trying to say, which I’m sure is frustrating to him. He can be difficult and demanding, but he is precious and has an adorably expressive face and voice.
Emily, our baby, is not really a baby anymore. Almost 17 months old now, she is constantly running, climbing, pulling chairs and stools around the house in order to reach all kinds of dangerous or messy things. Emily talks little but understands a lot. She loves her siblings and they love her. It is truly delightful to have a baby, especially with a house full of adoring siblings.
We are so grateful for you, our friends and family, and for the peace we have in our lives because of our Savior, Jesus Christ, and his wonderful Gospel. We pray that you are well and happy and can see the hand of the Lord in your lives through your good times as well as your challenges.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
October 11, 2008
Hello Everyone!
We hope you are enjoying the last of the flowers and green leaves as the cool autumn winds blow in. It is beautiful – every season is – but I don’t enjoy the long, cold winter that is sure to follow. Anyway, we are doing well. We went on our first trip to Disneyland for a week near the end of September. We nearly ended up cancelling the trip because our children were being so irresponsible about their make-up homework since we would be missing an entire week of school, but once they realized the trip was in jeopardy, they whipped themselves into shape. We had so much fun together! I went into the whole Disneyland experience somewhat cynical, wondering what all the hype was about. But I have to admit that we had such a good time, I would love to go back as a family again at least once before the kids start leaving for college (in four short years!) Part of the fun was just being there together for the sole purpose of enjoying each other, but part of it was the family friendly, detail-oriented atmosphere of Disneyland. We loved it!
I will backtrack a little bit and report things that have gone on in the last couple of months. After a couple of weeks of being frustrated by the disorganization and the hassle of transporting reluctant kids to and from the charter school, Kristen and James decided to withdraw Jamie, Guts, and Josie and have them attend the local elementary school. We were all sad (especially the kids,) and it really caused me to reconsider whether we were doing the right thing, especially in view of how much more work it is for me. Since I am in charge of fundraising for the parent organization of the school, I didn’t feel like I could just drop out and leave them high and dry. Fortunately, as time has passed, we have become more comfortable with our decision and Wrights with theirs. I have been so impressed the last month and a half with the additions to the curriculum as well as most of the kids’ teachers, and for the first time I feel that our children are really being challenged and taught to think beyond just the rote, oversimplified concepts they have been taught until now. I haven’t spent much time volunteering at the school yet, but hopefully I can work out swapping kids with another mom one day a week so that we can both help in our children’s classes.
I don’t remember whether I mentioned that we have had leaking in our basement three different times over the last year anytime we have had a large amount of rain or snowmelt, but it had become big concern and hassle, and I knew we would need to figure out how to fix it before the ground freezes again. Thanks to my dad and my brother, Mike, the problem is now fixed (hopefully forever!) after a day of hard work drilling through our impenetrable clay soil and some plastic tarps which were inexplicably placed in a couple of the window wells and were preventing water from draining. What a relief – thank you, Dad and Mike! We also had new countertops and a new sink installed in our kitchen just a couple days before we left for Disneyland. The countertops are beautiful, but even more than that, I love the deep stainless steel sink which looks shiny and clean and hides the dirty dishes, and the new faucet which no longer leaks water onto the wood cabinets below.
I’m so grateful that Hugh takes such good care of us that we don’t have to worry about the necessities and can do fun extras like Disneyland and new counters once in a while. Hugh has been able to work from home only a handful of times since we got high-speed internet. People keep scheduling meetings for which he must be present, so at least so far it hasn’t worked out the way we had planned. He doesn’t seem as tired lately as some times in the past, thank goodness. He has enjoyed watching BYU Football, though he says it has been a relatively boring season because BYU is so much better than the teams they have played.
Steven, Daniel, Julia, and Alyssa just finished their soccer season within the last week. Steven loves soccer so much that he dropped out of his art class when he found that a soccer class was offered. It hasn’t turned out to be what he was hoping, but he will be glad to have it, especially now that the regular season is over. Steven opted to take two advanced math classes this year, and the jury is still out as to whether that was the best decision. About a week before our Disneyland trip, I found out that Steven was failing his Health class and had a C- in Algebra 2. He is fully capable of earning all A’s, so we have had to put some restrictions on him until he figures out how to apply himself in order to earn the grades he should be getting. He is a reluctant Scout, who would skip his Young Men activities at church most of the time, the Pow-wows and campouts always if we let him. Still, he is basically a good, pleasant kid. Hopefully we are pushing him in the areas which matter the most.
Daniel is enjoying school, thanks to a great teacher, and a new friend he made – a kid named Jon who is attending school for the first time in his life, having been home-schooled through fifth grade. Daniel likes his elective art class, but is also expressing an interest in drama. He has specified that there is to be no singing or dancing, ONLY acting, so we’ll have to see if there is such an option. Daniel, Julia, and Michael are participating in a program called RAD kids, which teaches children how and when to defend themselves against aggression or harm. Since the twelve hours of classes are taught on the weekends during what would otherwise be the kids’ treasured free time, they were very resistant to the idea of participating in the class. I gave them no choice and a little bribery (a shake or treat after each class,) and I really think that in the end they will be glad they did it.
Julia also has a wonderful teacher and is enjoying and being challenged in school. She is currently working on a board game based on the Underground Railroad for a project in history. Her class will be writing and producing an opera together this year in school. The charter school holds a History Fair on Halloween during which each grade level dresses up as characters from a certain assigned time period or geographical region. The fifth grade was assigned the Civil War, so originally Julia wanted to sew (or wanted me to sew) a Southern Belle type dress, but since I have qualms about whether we have the skill and the time to do that, she has decided instead that she will dress as a slave (we can probably handle that.)
Michael was so sad to lose his cousin, Guts, as a classmate. He is struggling with a competent but strict teacher. He is very bright, but emotionally immature, which raises behavioral challenges at home (and probably at school) in terms of his not taking ownership of things that are his responsibility (like homework, chores, practicing piano, and just basically being pleasant to others.) I am hoping to help him to understand that when he makes a choice, there are always consequences associated with that choice – some good, and some bad – and he needs to learn to look at both the immediate and the eventual consequences of his choices and weigh them out. He just finished his first season of flag football, which he enjoyed. He is not the biggest kid on the team, but he is one of the fastest. Since he takes the game seriously and is quick, he was able to score half a dozen touchdowns throughout the season.
It has been an interesting couple of months with Alyssa. She has had a tendency ever since she was in preschool to exhibit serious separation anxiety. You may remember what a challenge it was last year for me to get her to go to kindergarten and dance class. I had hoped that it was just a phase, and that she would see that even though she may be afraid when she goes, everything turns out fine, we’re still here for her, she’s okay, etc. A couple weeks into school she started becoming very anxious and throwing tantrums and clinging to me, sobbing and refusing to go to school. The assistant principal and the secretaries at the office were so kind and accommodating to Alyssa, allowing her to sit with them as long as she needed to in order to gather up the courage to go to class. Alyssa loves her teacher, and there are some really sweet kids in her class (one morning four of her classmates stopped to try to comfort and reassure Alyssa when she was struggling to leave me.) When I had tried everything I could think of to figure out where this was coming from and what to do about it, I decided to take her to a psychologist. The therapist has worked with me more than with Alyssa to help me understand how to approach the situation so that Alyssa will respond differently, and it has helped a lot. I wish I knew more of this parenting stuff intuitively, but every kid is so different, and what works with one doesn’t necessarily work for another. Anyway, hopefully we will be able to apply what we have learned to the other kids as well.
We decided to try a different kind of music class with Natalie and Alyssa called “Let’s Play Music” which teaches music theory through games and songs and a lot of hands-on, multi-sensory techniques. I have to attend the class with the girls every other week, so it is fortunate that Steven and Daniel are willing and able to watch the little ones for an hour or so while I am gone. Alyssa, Natalie, and I are all out of our comfort zones singing and dancing in front of/alongside other people, so hopefully this will help us to not be so shy and self-conscious. Natalie has been trying Alyssa’s trick of refusing to go to preschool, but since I have a better understanding of how to respond to it, it hasn’t gotten too carried away. It is fun to get into the mind of a four year old. Natalie told me, “If I grow up to be a cement worker, I won’t swear because you’ve taught me right.” (This after various related conversations over the last year or two...) Fortunately, Natalie has been more sweet than sour lately, but like Alyssa, her mood can change very unexpectedly. Natalie likes to check out books from the library and “read” them to me. She is able to sound out simple words, but doesn’t have the desire or tenacity to really learn how to read just yet. She also thinks she can play all different songs on the digital piano that are programmed in and will play correctly whether she hits the right notes or not. I hope that feature will not end up being counter-productive to her musical education!
Like his brother Michael did when he was two or three, Matthew has a hat to which he is very attached. He wears it every moment he is awake, sleeps with it right next to him, and seeks it out the moment he wakes from a nap or in the morning. His original “Old Navy” hat had become very ragged and dirty-looking, and we wondered how we could ever get him to part with it until Julia found a spiffy black Speed Racer hat, which he instantly took a liking to. He is in the habit of whining, crying, throwing fits, and generally being quite unpleasant, so now that he is becoming more verbal, we are trying to teach him how to use words to express what he wants. He does have such an irresistibly cute, animated little face, especially when he is happy or excited about something.
Emily, now 14 ½ months old, is becoming such a little person. She is not as stoic as she was for a long time; she actually smiles and claps and gives “high fives” and other fun responses – at least to people in our family (she is still quiet and shy with anyone she doesn’t know well.) She carries on conversations with us in her own language, complete with nods or shakes of the head and very emphatically pronounced sounds and lively expressions. She is constantly climbing (and falling) and getting into things. She thinks she is too big to crawl up and down the stairs, even though she is so small each stair comes halfway up her thigh. She skillfully supports herself walking up the stairs with one hand braced against the wall, and goes down on her behind, one step at a time. She has learned to sleep through the night most of the time, but her naps are erratic since I often have to pack her up four or five times a day to run older kids to school and other activities.
I know this is very long, but one last thing I will mention is that my parents are still here. They were supposed to have left yesterday for their humanitarian mission to Bangalore, India, but a couple days ago found out that their visas had not yet come through. So we are enjoying a few last chances to see them this weekend before their 18-month absence.
We hope you are happy and well.
We hope you are enjoying the last of the flowers and green leaves as the cool autumn winds blow in. It is beautiful – every season is – but I don’t enjoy the long, cold winter that is sure to follow. Anyway, we are doing well. We went on our first trip to Disneyland for a week near the end of September. We nearly ended up cancelling the trip because our children were being so irresponsible about their make-up homework since we would be missing an entire week of school, but once they realized the trip was in jeopardy, they whipped themselves into shape. We had so much fun together! I went into the whole Disneyland experience somewhat cynical, wondering what all the hype was about. But I have to admit that we had such a good time, I would love to go back as a family again at least once before the kids start leaving for college (in four short years!) Part of the fun was just being there together for the sole purpose of enjoying each other, but part of it was the family friendly, detail-oriented atmosphere of Disneyland. We loved it!
I will backtrack a little bit and report things that have gone on in the last couple of months. After a couple of weeks of being frustrated by the disorganization and the hassle of transporting reluctant kids to and from the charter school, Kristen and James decided to withdraw Jamie, Guts, and Josie and have them attend the local elementary school. We were all sad (especially the kids,) and it really caused me to reconsider whether we were doing the right thing, especially in view of how much more work it is for me. Since I am in charge of fundraising for the parent organization of the school, I didn’t feel like I could just drop out and leave them high and dry. Fortunately, as time has passed, we have become more comfortable with our decision and Wrights with theirs. I have been so impressed the last month and a half with the additions to the curriculum as well as most of the kids’ teachers, and for the first time I feel that our children are really being challenged and taught to think beyond just the rote, oversimplified concepts they have been taught until now. I haven’t spent much time volunteering at the school yet, but hopefully I can work out swapping kids with another mom one day a week so that we can both help in our children’s classes.
I don’t remember whether I mentioned that we have had leaking in our basement three different times over the last year anytime we have had a large amount of rain or snowmelt, but it had become big concern and hassle, and I knew we would need to figure out how to fix it before the ground freezes again. Thanks to my dad and my brother, Mike, the problem is now fixed (hopefully forever!) after a day of hard work drilling through our impenetrable clay soil and some plastic tarps which were inexplicably placed in a couple of the window wells and were preventing water from draining. What a relief – thank you, Dad and Mike! We also had new countertops and a new sink installed in our kitchen just a couple days before we left for Disneyland. The countertops are beautiful, but even more than that, I love the deep stainless steel sink which looks shiny and clean and hides the dirty dishes, and the new faucet which no longer leaks water onto the wood cabinets below.
I’m so grateful that Hugh takes such good care of us that we don’t have to worry about the necessities and can do fun extras like Disneyland and new counters once in a while. Hugh has been able to work from home only a handful of times since we got high-speed internet. People keep scheduling meetings for which he must be present, so at least so far it hasn’t worked out the way we had planned. He doesn’t seem as tired lately as some times in the past, thank goodness. He has enjoyed watching BYU Football, though he says it has been a relatively boring season because BYU is so much better than the teams they have played.
Steven, Daniel, Julia, and Alyssa just finished their soccer season within the last week. Steven loves soccer so much that he dropped out of his art class when he found that a soccer class was offered. It hasn’t turned out to be what he was hoping, but he will be glad to have it, especially now that the regular season is over. Steven opted to take two advanced math classes this year, and the jury is still out as to whether that was the best decision. About a week before our Disneyland trip, I found out that Steven was failing his Health class and had a C- in Algebra 2. He is fully capable of earning all A’s, so we have had to put some restrictions on him until he figures out how to apply himself in order to earn the grades he should be getting. He is a reluctant Scout, who would skip his Young Men activities at church most of the time, the Pow-wows and campouts always if we let him. Still, he is basically a good, pleasant kid. Hopefully we are pushing him in the areas which matter the most.
Daniel is enjoying school, thanks to a great teacher, and a new friend he made – a kid named Jon who is attending school for the first time in his life, having been home-schooled through fifth grade. Daniel likes his elective art class, but is also expressing an interest in drama. He has specified that there is to be no singing or dancing, ONLY acting, so we’ll have to see if there is such an option. Daniel, Julia, and Michael are participating in a program called RAD kids, which teaches children how and when to defend themselves against aggression or harm. Since the twelve hours of classes are taught on the weekends during what would otherwise be the kids’ treasured free time, they were very resistant to the idea of participating in the class. I gave them no choice and a little bribery (a shake or treat after each class,) and I really think that in the end they will be glad they did it.
Julia also has a wonderful teacher and is enjoying and being challenged in school. She is currently working on a board game based on the Underground Railroad for a project in history. Her class will be writing and producing an opera together this year in school. The charter school holds a History Fair on Halloween during which each grade level dresses up as characters from a certain assigned time period or geographical region. The fifth grade was assigned the Civil War, so originally Julia wanted to sew (or wanted me to sew) a Southern Belle type dress, but since I have qualms about whether we have the skill and the time to do that, she has decided instead that she will dress as a slave (we can probably handle that.)
Michael was so sad to lose his cousin, Guts, as a classmate. He is struggling with a competent but strict teacher. He is very bright, but emotionally immature, which raises behavioral challenges at home (and probably at school) in terms of his not taking ownership of things that are his responsibility (like homework, chores, practicing piano, and just basically being pleasant to others.) I am hoping to help him to understand that when he makes a choice, there are always consequences associated with that choice – some good, and some bad – and he needs to learn to look at both the immediate and the eventual consequences of his choices and weigh them out. He just finished his first season of flag football, which he enjoyed. He is not the biggest kid on the team, but he is one of the fastest. Since he takes the game seriously and is quick, he was able to score half a dozen touchdowns throughout the season.
It has been an interesting couple of months with Alyssa. She has had a tendency ever since she was in preschool to exhibit serious separation anxiety. You may remember what a challenge it was last year for me to get her to go to kindergarten and dance class. I had hoped that it was just a phase, and that she would see that even though she may be afraid when she goes, everything turns out fine, we’re still here for her, she’s okay, etc. A couple weeks into school she started becoming very anxious and throwing tantrums and clinging to me, sobbing and refusing to go to school. The assistant principal and the secretaries at the office were so kind and accommodating to Alyssa, allowing her to sit with them as long as she needed to in order to gather up the courage to go to class. Alyssa loves her teacher, and there are some really sweet kids in her class (one morning four of her classmates stopped to try to comfort and reassure Alyssa when she was struggling to leave me.) When I had tried everything I could think of to figure out where this was coming from and what to do about it, I decided to take her to a psychologist. The therapist has worked with me more than with Alyssa to help me understand how to approach the situation so that Alyssa will respond differently, and it has helped a lot. I wish I knew more of this parenting stuff intuitively, but every kid is so different, and what works with one doesn’t necessarily work for another. Anyway, hopefully we will be able to apply what we have learned to the other kids as well.
We decided to try a different kind of music class with Natalie and Alyssa called “Let’s Play Music” which teaches music theory through games and songs and a lot of hands-on, multi-sensory techniques. I have to attend the class with the girls every other week, so it is fortunate that Steven and Daniel are willing and able to watch the little ones for an hour or so while I am gone. Alyssa, Natalie, and I are all out of our comfort zones singing and dancing in front of/alongside other people, so hopefully this will help us to not be so shy and self-conscious. Natalie has been trying Alyssa’s trick of refusing to go to preschool, but since I have a better understanding of how to respond to it, it hasn’t gotten too carried away. It is fun to get into the mind of a four year old. Natalie told me, “If I grow up to be a cement worker, I won’t swear because you’ve taught me right.” (This after various related conversations over the last year or two...) Fortunately, Natalie has been more sweet than sour lately, but like Alyssa, her mood can change very unexpectedly. Natalie likes to check out books from the library and “read” them to me. She is able to sound out simple words, but doesn’t have the desire or tenacity to really learn how to read just yet. She also thinks she can play all different songs on the digital piano that are programmed in and will play correctly whether she hits the right notes or not. I hope that feature will not end up being counter-productive to her musical education!
Like his brother Michael did when he was two or three, Matthew has a hat to which he is very attached. He wears it every moment he is awake, sleeps with it right next to him, and seeks it out the moment he wakes from a nap or in the morning. His original “Old Navy” hat had become very ragged and dirty-looking, and we wondered how we could ever get him to part with it until Julia found a spiffy black Speed Racer hat, which he instantly took a liking to. He is in the habit of whining, crying, throwing fits, and generally being quite unpleasant, so now that he is becoming more verbal, we are trying to teach him how to use words to express what he wants. He does have such an irresistibly cute, animated little face, especially when he is happy or excited about something.
Emily, now 14 ½ months old, is becoming such a little person. She is not as stoic as she was for a long time; she actually smiles and claps and gives “high fives” and other fun responses – at least to people in our family (she is still quiet and shy with anyone she doesn’t know well.) She carries on conversations with us in her own language, complete with nods or shakes of the head and very emphatically pronounced sounds and lively expressions. She is constantly climbing (and falling) and getting into things. She thinks she is too big to crawl up and down the stairs, even though she is so small each stair comes halfway up her thigh. She skillfully supports herself walking up the stairs with one hand braced against the wall, and goes down on her behind, one step at a time. She has learned to sleep through the night most of the time, but her naps are erratic since I often have to pack her up four or five times a day to run older kids to school and other activities.
I know this is very long, but one last thing I will mention is that my parents are still here. They were supposed to have left yesterday for their humanitarian mission to Bangalore, India, but a couple days ago found out that their visas had not yet come through. So we are enjoying a few last chances to see them this weekend before their 18-month absence.
We hope you are happy and well.
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